Simon, boats and fishers of people

It wasn’t always like this.

I mean, it was clear I sensed a call, an urge to do something more with church, with God.

But becoming a priest seemed to be bit much.

Priests were those other people, those great ones, the ones who could own a room with their presence alone.

They had that air about them, confidently engaging the closed off with humor and scripture; disarming the angry with calmed self-assurance and scripture; engaging with folks, one on one and in groups, with their loquacious ease and scripture.

Those were the outgoing priests.

The introverted priests still had that mysterious command over folks and could calmly insinuate themselves into life of a parish; institute change with quiet words and forthright deeds; their point of view came across not through sturm und drang, but a subtle nod to scripture and how the word of God plays out in all of our lives.

These were the priests of my youth, the outgoing and the quiet. One would speak so well from the pulpit about justice and relieving hunger, the other spoke through Christmas pageant scripts and the actions of the parish, allowing it to lead itself with the gentle hand of the rector guiding the church along ensuring it didn’t run off course.

And from my point of view, I was neither of those.

I was content with my quiet life.

I was happy with Sunday morning snuggles on the couch with my children; spending time with Jenn in our little house raising a family and being together.

And yet a call did come.

And that call grew louder and louder.

It grew through Friday night youth programs and then teaching J2A.

It grew through serving on the vestry and then serving as Treasurer.

It grew through volunteering for the church and then eventually working for it.

It grew until I finally listened to that long ago and now present call to serve as a priest in God’s church.

And yet even through the process of ordination from nominee to postulant to candidate to deacon to priest, there was still that nagging and there is still that nagging sense of… Really?

You called me to do this?

To even pretend I could be a priest in the manner of those two priests I grew up with and helped to form me?

Who taught me how to be an acolyte?

Who guided me through confirmation?

Lord, you want me to do that?

Impossible.

And yet, and I’m still wondering if I imagined it and continue to imagine, hearing that call.

I suppose it’s too late now anyway, the kids are too old for Sunday morning snuggles…

This morning we heard about another call, Jesus calling his disciples, the physical in the flesh right here in front of you Jesus was calling his disciples.

And I also wonder if it was a tired Jesus, a Jesus new to his ministry, just getting used to the crowds that were starting to follow him.

We need to remind ourselves that Jesus, while the son of God was also fully human.

Fully able to feel weary when tired.

Fully able to feel wary of the crowds.

Fully able to want to separate and rest for a bit; preach from a boat and not feel the constant rush of crowds pressing up against him; wanting his healing touch; wanting his miracles; wanting his everything.

And so we find Jesus settling in Simon’s boat, asking him to put away a little bit from shore, separating himself from his followers if only temporarily and teaching from there.

And then the teaching was done.

Did the crowd disperse?

Did they sit on the shore for a spell waiting for after the intermission when Jesus would surely come out of the boat to be with his people?

Perhaps this was one of those all day things and they took out a picnic lunch.

It’s all so unclear but what is clear is that Jesus asked Simon to take his boat out further from shore and to fish for a little bit.

Now, I imagine when this all started, Simon and his crew had just come into shore and was beginning to put away the tackle, tying up the sail, securing the boat to shore and then here comes this guy with a large crowd following him.

Perhaps Simon heard of Jesus already, Galilee wasn’t a metropolis and news can travel fast in small towns and villages so he wasn’t surprised when Jesus showed up trailing his crowd of followers.

And he was a good neighbor so “absolutely, come on Jesus, let’s push out from shore for a little bit, do what you need to do.”

And that was fine.

But maybe the crowds did not disperse and maybe they clamored for more and maybe Jesus just needed to continue to rest for a spell.

So Jesus told Simon to pull out from shore a little further.

Fish some more even though your day seemed wasted.

Drop some nets even though they came up empty time after time, all day and again.

And Simon replied, “Master, we have worked all night long but have caught nothing. Yet if you say so, I will let down the nets.”

And they fished some more even though their day seemed wasted.

And they fished some more even through their nets came up empty earlier in the day.

And they hauled fish after fish, full net after full net.

Their nets were straining they were so full, their boats were getting close to sinking for they were carrying such a load of fish.

This was fish for days.

This was fish for them to feed their families.

This was fish for Simon to sell.

He could pay his crew.

He would earn money to keep away the tax collector; he would feed his family with items bought from the market.

He was witnessing the impossible; comfort for his family in hardscrabble town living a hardscrabbl life.

And Simon then knew he was called to do other things than catch fish.

And Simon did not feel worthy.

“Go away from me, Lord, for I am a sinful man!”

Simon, flush with fish and miracles, just did not feel worthy.

And yet Simon, despite his feelings of unworthiness, was called.

Simon, along with James and John the sons of Zebedee, those Sons of Thunder, were called.

And how could he ever measure up?

And isn’t the answer in the miracle that they just witness?

Isn’t the fullness of their nets evidence of God’s abundance?

Abundant blessings?

Abundant miracles?

Abundant support?

And is it possible we can see ourselves in Simon’s shoes?

That though we seem unworthy, we too are called?

Friends, we are called.

Even though we might not see ourselves fit to serve God and serve Christ, we are still called to do so.

For we have the tools inherent within our very being; our essence is to serve as it is Christ who gives us the ability to do so.

Certainly, Jesus was the cause of the miracle here but do not discount the fact that it was Simon and his crew along with his partners James and John who hoisted up those nets.

Jesus filled the waters with fish and Simon navigated his boat to find them.

Simon, as unworthy as he felt, was already acting to help fulfill the miracle that Christ conceived.

And as unworthy as we all sometimes feel, we are already working to fulfill Christ’s works here in the present day.

This is not a sermon about me dwelling on the impossibility of God calling me to be a priest, but the very beauty, the very holiness of carrying Christ’s word from this place and into a world wanting to be born anew.

And the beauty is found not in the words emanating from this pulpit but in the very fact that you, we, us; we are all called to act, to serve, to do and to build.

We all have a role to play.

We all have passions to fulfill.

We all are called to serve in whatever capacity and in whichever context.

And God gives us the tools to do so; God gives us the tools to build ministry and to share the word.

We can fish the abundant waters of humanity looking for a better way; looking to feed the hungry; looking to stop being hungry themselves.

And it starts with you.

You are called just as I am called, just as Simon was called.

And will we answer that call?

Will we leave our full nets of doubt and trust in Jesus to guide our ministries knowing that Jesus will feed those ministries?

Will we leave this building wondering what we are called to do?

Will we act?

Will we trust?

Will we try and fail?

And will we fail and will we try again?

Because Jesus has blessed us with an abundance of gifts, no one person is called to do it all but together, together we have the capacity to lift our full nets and feed those hungering for a kinder world, a more just world.

And we hear this all over our scripture readings this morning.

Isaiah at first doubts his call, he says: "Woe is me! I am lost, for I am a man of unclean lips, and I live among a people of unclean lips; yet my eyes have seen the King, the Lord of hosts!"

And then a seraph cleans Isaiah’s lips and God asks who God should send and Isaiah responds, "Here am I; send me!"

Friends, our faith in Jesus has cleaned our lips, we cannot hide from Christ’s call, “here we are, Lord; send us!”

Send us Lord to share your love; send us Lord to share in your miracles; we are called to act.

The abundance of God’s miracles is measured only by the need for those miracles.

And we see Simon’s boat and we know that Jesus can provide us with the abundance to provide, to feed, and to make those whole who hunger for so much; make ourselves whole who hunger to serve and hunger for more.

Yes, there remains hunger and it is on us to feed the hungry.

Through God, we can do that.

How we do that is discerned through prayer, your prayers, all of our prayers.

How do we feed a hungry world hungering for so many things?

Let us drop our nets.

Let us find out.

Amen.